


Happiness

by alecswish



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Alec Lightwood, BAMF Magnus Bane, Background Camille Belcourt, Dark Magnus Bane, Emotionally Hurt Alec Lightwood, Emotionally Hurt Magnus Bane, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Immortal Husbands, Good Parent Maryse Lightwood, Good Sibling Isabelle Lightwood, Good Sibling Jace Wayland, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Hurt Magnus Bane, Implied/Referenced Past Abuse, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parabatai Bond, Past Magnus Bane/Camille Belcourt, References to Depression, Self-Esteem Issues, Supportive Jace Wayland, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, also based on 3x19 promo, based on 3x17 and 3x18, maybe? - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-15 05:44:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18492571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alecswish/pseuds/alecswish
Summary: After Magnus's breakdown, Alec began thinking of ways to get his magic and immortality back and went to Asmodeus to make a deal. Asmodeus agrees to give it back, only if Alec breaks up with Magnus. Alec would do anything to help Magnus, even if that means giving up his own chance of happiness. Will Magnus find out what Alec did after he gets his magic back? Can Alec and Magnus recover from this? Will they get their happy ending after all their suffering?





	Happiness

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! This is my first published fanfic in this fandom, and I hope you enjoy it. There will be a lot of angst, but eventually there will be a happy ending for these two because frankly they deserve it. The tags will change if there is anything I find that may be triggering to people, and please feel free to let me know if you think I need to add or change the tags! I will also include a warning at the beginning of each chapter if there is something that might be triggereing included.

_“I’ll give his magic back if you end your relationship. Break his heart to save his life.”_

            Asmodeus’s words rang in Alec’s head as he walked to his mother’s shop. He walked slow, his thoughts racing as he deliberated on what he was going to do. His hands were in his pockets with one of them fiddling with the ring box he had been carrying around since the failed proposal. He already knew what he had to do and was using the walk back to strengthen his resolve.

            As he walked, his thoughts wandered to all the times he had been told he wasn’t good enough, he was second best, or he wasn’t anybody’s first choice. He remembered when Jace came to live with them and how his parents started comparing the two of them, even when he worked so hard and actually did better than Jace. When his parents stopped him from learning more piano, because that was Jace’s thing and Alec couldn’t compare. Or the times where Alec got blamed for Jace and Izzy’s mistakes and actions.

            He remembered how shocked he was when Jace came to him and asked him to become parabatai. Jace, who could have picked anyone, chose _him_ first. Alec got used to the feeling of someone actually listening to him, and he enjoyed it. Then the sinking realization that even as parabatai and the Head of the Institute, he would be Jace’s second choice whenever Clary was involved. Whatever Clary wanted she got. Meanwhile, when Alec felt like his world was crumbling down around him after Magnus almost _died_ , Jace was with Clary summoning Lilith.

            One of the first times Alec felt like he was important was when he met Magnus. Magnus noticed him first. Not his siblings but _him_. Magnus had constantly chosen Alec and helped him even if he didn’t have to. Alec had got used to being loved and taken care of. Magnus had made sure that he took care of himself whenever he had a bad mental health day or was stressed from work. Magnus had given up his magic, a vital part of himself, to help Jace because he was Alec’s parabatai. Magnus had constantly been selfless, and now he was suffering because of it.

            Alec’s mind flashed back to after the dinner, when he had found out how insecure and self-deprecating Magnus was, and it pained him to see the man he loved think so lowly of himself. Watching Magnus break down trying to leave, so Alec wouldn’t have to see him like that, felt like an arrow in his heart. He wanted to cry himself, but he remained strong for Magnus. He held him until Magnus stopped crying and then brought them back to his room. He helped Magnus undress and gently wiped the makeup off his face before laying him in bed. He quickly undressed himself and slipped under the covers, pulling Magnus to him so he could hold him. He kissed Magnus on the head and tightened his hold when he felt Magnus trembling.

            Alec had discovered the joys of being someone’s first choice and being told he was enough. Would it hurt to give that up and go back to being second best? Yes. This time though? Alec would be okay with being second, as long as Magnus was happy. He’d be giving up his own happiness, but he’d be comforted with seeing Magnus loving himself again. Alec would learn how to be happy with that. With that in mind, Alec made it back to the bookshop and walked inside, preparing himself for what he had to do.


End file.
